Monday, May 08, 2006

How much of selves?

Probably the most difficult thing to do is to keep your external calm, when inside you your thoughts are on an express roller coaster ride. I came across this quote somewhere, and found it really poignant.

If there is a me that curses and cries
And a me that winks and walks in peace
Do I have a choice of selves?
I'm sure quite a few people have some sort of restlessness inside them. Many a times even while being in a crowd, there is a sense of aloofness. You find yourself drifting away in your thoughts. You smile and engage in small talk but your mind is not there with you.

Reading the lines above, I can relate to those phrases 'curses n cries' and 'winks and walks in peace'. I have experienced both in some part of my life. But I guess the toughest part of being oneself comes not in 'choice of selves' but choice in 'how much' of each of those selves. Each one of us is fighting to find that out about ourselves. That might just be one of the reasons for the restlessness, bouts of loneliness and irrational exhuberance. (if I may borrow th phrase from Allan Greenspan!)

This is also life, I guess.