Where is the party - Ada Namma uttla party!!!

This space has been neglected for the past couple of weeks. Not necessarily because I was busy, but because somehow I felt I did not have anything to say. (Now don't ask me if whatever I have said here so far is of supreme value or not ;) )

Last month has been different, if I may say so. Three of my friends and I took a 5 day short holiday to Sri Lanka - where we did a road trip across Sri Lanka. We had a great deal on flight tickets which we capitalised really well. 5 days was perfect, not too long, not too short. We did something different, something new each day. From beaches to temples to forts to hikes, it was a lot of fun. 5 days just whizzed by. Sigh!

This Sri Lanka trip was my first 'vacation' vacation in last 3 years. Yes, I have taken breaks but they were always one or two days off whenever I travel to a new place on work or couple of days if I go home. But this time I was in a faraway land where I was incommunicado. And I realised something very simple. Your surroundings influence you and your thoughts profoundly. When in Bombay (oops Mumbai) I can never switch off from routine work/ thoughts. When at home in Bangalore/ Chennai I cannot escape conversations or thoughts which still link back to a lot of memories (good and not so good). However, when I was in SL, I was switched off completely from routine life and conversations. It was refreshing.

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I recognise one aspect of my life - that I am immensely Lucky. I won the genetic lottery. I have great family and friends who can be called upon selfishly at any time for anything. I truly consider myself privileged. I also recognise that luck and good fortune has had a big role in my life as it does on everyone's life. Somehow I never get to articulate my thoughts and feelings to convey why I feel so strongly about this. I guess I am linguistically challenged. Hence I did the next best thing. Found someone who shares similar thoughts but can articulate it much better than I ever could.

I would recommend everyone to spare 20 min of their precious time to listen through this video.

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Two years ago, I was shifted into the team I am currently working in. For the first year or so I was working full time on this team and project and for past year my responsibilities are split between this team and a new project. Being part of this team and project has been an absolute pleasure. I know that I put in tremendous effort for this team, more than any other projects/ teams that I have worked on. And it never felt like hard work.

I remember this one time, December 2007, when I had to travel from Delhi to Ludhiana. There were no day train tickets available, so I was forced to take the night train. It was 1 degree Celsius that night and in second class compartment with the wind chill factor it was close to -1 or -2 degrees. I couldn't sleep one bit that night. I had never before experiences such cold and was ill equipped in terms of warm clothes. I thought I would freeze to death and my body could be used for some cryogenic experiments, all in the interest of science and humanity. I couldn't even sit down as the berths were frigid. I kept walking around the compartment the entire night. It did not help much when I noticed that there were only 2 others in the compartment that night. That moment I realised that if I were to sleep, I would either be frozen on mugged. Sleep deprived, cold, icicled, I walked into my hotel at 5 am, had a hot water bath and went straight to work.

This is just a funny anecdote for me. I knew I had to get the work done and the train journey was a minor irritant that had to be dealt with. But for another person I know, an incident like this, is yet another reason to crib about their job. Disregarding all other parameters and over simplifying everything else, I have come to the conclusion that the only reason, I worked harder, longer and yet did not think that it was such a pain, was because I was having fun. The team members of team A were fabulous and we got on really well. Also, we were doing something for first time in India, so there was almost entrepreneurial like feeling to the team and the work that we were doing.

Over the last year, 2 of the team mates have moved on, things are different now. Having been in this project for close to two and a half years, I have been asking for a change for a while. And I definitely think, it is time to move on for personal growth. The last few months on this project have been dull and hence it had coloured my perception of the entire three year experience.

All that changed on Friday night. Friday was our company's annual meet where we celebrated last year's performance. I won an award for 'Breakthrough Performance' on this project. The cash isn't big - a small gift voucher but the significance of the award hit me much later, when I was contemplating on the last 3 years. Working on this team and this project has equipped me with certain experiences and skill sets that are quite unique and very few people in the Indian FMCG industry have. I loved working on this project and with the team and guess what, over the past 3 years I have been recognized for my performance at various forums internally a record 6 times.

I don't write this here to brag. Yes a few compliments would be welcome :). But intent of my sharing this is that I learnt something very important. It is essential to pause occasionally and introspect. We are so busy in our day to day lives and so obsessed with planning and plotting for the next goal that we forget to recognise how far we have already come. Internalising this simple aspect, can be a source of immense self confidence. The above observation is true for me. I am spending this weekend, in my bed (as I am down with viral Fever :( ), gloating over my achievements. Monday morning is work as usual. The cycle for this year starts. The trophy closet means nothing more than higher expectations and bigger challenges to the outside world. But that is tomorrow. Today I am self indulgent.

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There she goes

It is end of an era.

MGM is a batch mate of mine from B school. She sat next to me in the first year till our electives separated us. We played silly school games sitting next to each other, passed chits, gossiped etc. Both of us were initially lost in the big bad B school world and helped each other find our way through the two years.

During our two month internship period I was in Madras and she in Bombay. She had a bad project and I was stuck in a place where everyone was 30+ and all they spoke about was diapers, admitting kids to schools and in-laws. What kept me (and her) going was yahoo messenger. MGM and I would chat incessantly on YM through the day. Two months ended, just like that.

Through second year on campus and the last three years of work, one thing that has remained constant is our chatting. When gtalk was disabled in her office we moved to another client, found some other proxy and eventually moved to mail-chat, exchanging close to 15-20 emails a day, if not more. We would talk about everything under sun - movies, music, books, our crushes, share interesting articles we read online, gossip about our batch mates/friends and so on. I don't know why, but I have a vivid recollection of this conversation when she mentioned her boyfriend/ fiancé for the first time. Never had I seen her more self assured. We are almost witnesses to each other’s lives, just living in different cities. Somehow we never run out of conversations. There have been days when sitting in Chennai office, I have chatted with her entire day then we would go out later in the evening for a drink and dinner. We would still have enough to chatter about.

My writing skills aren't spectacular, to say the least. And it was the same case when I had to fill out forms for companies to convince them that I was a suitable candidate. I would send the first draft of my form to MGM only to get it back with umpteen crosses and corrections. I wonder if she was living out her dream of becoming a teacher, like her mother, vicariously, returning my drafts with red marks all over them.

Last week she quit her job, to join her husband in US. Her She H1B visa did not get approved even though 20,000 slots are still lying vacant. A big shift for her - to sit at home at least for a while till she finds a job or they decide to shift elsewhere. It looks like her move out of India is going to last for the foreseeable future.

When I get to office tomorrow, after almost 2 weeks, I know I am not going find her 'Good morning' mail in my mailbox. Sigh! It is not like she has gone incommunicado or disappeared forever, but the nonstop (non)sense chatter that for so long, I had taken for granted, will not exist starting tomorrow. But right now, I know nothing can make her happier than being with the boy after close to 2 years of long distance.