I have been absconding for a while. I am shamelessly providing an excuse. See below for the same :)
The last 3 weeks have been phenomenally positive for the Indian spirit and there has been no better showcasing of what India stood for. Or at the very least what we wanted the world to see India for-Our reaction to Ayodhya and the staging and performance at the Commonwealth games.
The Ayodhya verdict was delivered in end September. The court ruling decreed that archeologically, a temple indeed existed prior to the mosque and that for centuries the collective consciousness of the Hindu society has believed that, that very spot is the birthplace of Lord Ram. So another ‘batwaara' was done, splitting the land between the two communities.
Enough ink has been spent analysing the verdict from all possible angles (social, political, religious, legal, socio-political and so on). To me what stood out is the maturity of the response to the verdict from both the parties. Any legal judgment by its very character creates victors and losers. Throw in religion and add the 'respect of minority rights' garnishing to this and you have a heady cocktail that could easily lead to social unrest.
The BJP has famously argued that ' Ram hamaari Asmita hai...' (Ram is our sense of pride, the identification of our ego) and in many senses, this verdict is a validation of the BJP's stance. There is no justification of the riots that followed, the murders that occurred and social divisiveness that was created due to the bringing down of the mosque. The BJP could have very easily gone around town claiming victory of a cause that they have espoused since their inception. But you did not have any BJP leader saying so. In fact, the RSS leader came out and said that this verdict should not be seen as a victory for one community over the other. What a stark difference from the strident voices that we have heard in the past. It could be well because they had a favourable verdict. But still, cut them some slack.
On the other hand, the Muslim leaders could have positioned this verdict not as a simple property ownership dispute but as yet another example of lack of minority rights protection and freedom in India. Though there are murmurs of this and a few politicians like Mulayam Singh Yadav did try to voice this, but by and large the response has been matured.
Given the relative calm with which the verdict was received the one statement that everyone is parroting is that India has finally moved on. I would argue that it is too early to say so. As a nation of 60 years that has lived with a collective consciousness of Ayodhya dispute and as a civilisation that has lived with collective subconsciousness of Lord Ram and Ayodhya, it is very difficult to wish away such memories overnight. Like one of my favourite columnist and one of India's most astute socio-political commentator Pratap Bhanu Mehta writes
"It is worth thinking about how these long-term trends will play out. We are perhaps being a little too blasé in our claims that India has moved on. The extent to which it has will be tested by our willingness to peaceably submit to the due process of courts. And there is reason to be optimistic on this score. But how much we have really moved on will be decided not today or tomorrow, but by how the long march of our history unfolds."
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As experts were scurrying from one TV studio to another in the first 3 days after the Ayodhya verdict, trying to provide perspective on a 11,000 page judgment that they had not read another spectacle was playing out in Delhi, the Commonwealth games. Following the terrible run up to the games and the negative PR that sometimes bordered on borderline prejudiced writing, the opening ceremony the national mood and international perception did a U turn. From being dismissive of the games, Indians as usual swung to the other extreme and started demanding Olympics in India. Sigh!
The pageantry on display during the opening ceremony was possibly the best display I have seen of India. This came closest to what I would call Incredible India. The drummers from all parts of the country, the famous train which open to display ambassadors and bazaars, the cultural dances that were thankfully without bollywood-isation, the Guru-shishya parampara .. oh! what a spectacle.
The opening ceremony possibly is the best encapsulation of not only navigating chaos and cacophony that is India but in fact celebrating it. The more I stay outside India, the more I realise the awesomeness of her diversity and character that I have taken for granted. (More on that in another post). We are a melting pot, an orchestra an avail, a khichdi. Each of the individual ingredients retain their identity but together they provide a different, pleasant and desirable taste.
The real stars of the games however were the athletes. 38 Golds and 101 medal in total- that is no mean achievement. And behind every achievement whether a medalist or not there is a story. A story that by now is so familiar. Lack of facilities and infrastructure; of absence of institutions and monetary support and of basic amenities. But there is also the other side. It is the story of hard work and pain, of sacrifices from the individual and family. It is also a story of fighting against all odds, biases and perceptions. A story of belief and ultimately triumph. It is a fairy tale that played out in front of our eyes.
To me the real heroes of the games are the women medalists and their families. Their challenges aren't just lack of facilities or training or monetary but that of social mindsets that they and their families needed to overcome. I hope the new found status (deservingly so) that these women have achieved in their society and community changes the entrenched mindsets which believes that women aren't as capable as men or have a role only inside the house. Many of the women athletes are from Punjab/ Haryana / Chattisgarh/Bihar. I hope the government takes this opportunity to communicate loud and strong against female infanticide.
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While the jury is still out on whether Sports builds character or not, I definitely believe it reveals character and helps you become better individuals. How to be gracious in victory, or how to lose and not feel a loser. Regardless of your background and talent, without consistent hard work there is no guarantee of success. In a sporting career, you will have ups and downs, victories and loses heartaches and heart breaks. As I read somewhere sports is life with volume turned up.
I was a very active sports person till I finished my college. I played cricket for league and clubs and basketball at university and state levels. I remember I would go to the basketball court, every evening after school, when I was 7th to 10th classes. The state team would practice there and I would sit and watch their drills. Post that college boys would play and I would sit there every day hoping that some guy would not turn up leaving a team short of players and I would be called upon to join them. I would run around fetching loose balls only to be noticed by them. There have been weeks I have spent sitting on the sidelines without a chance to play. And finally when you do get a chance to play, you are just filler. The ball would not be passed to you or even if it was you were to pass it back immediately. You couldn't afford to mess it up. For if you did, you wouldn't be called upon the next time.
While I was school team captain in basketball, I was nobody on this court. Patience was learnt by sitting out and waiting even though I knew I was good enough to be on court. I worked hard and turned up daily and waited patiently for that one chance to earn. I would be up early before sunrise to go to the court as it would be free for me to practise a few shots. Evenings I would be back again.
One very important lesson that basketball teaches you is that you may have a super star in the team but you need everyone to contribute. As Phil Jackson used to famously quip about Michael Jordon and the Chicago bulls - the strength of the pack is the wolf (that leads the hunt) and the strength of that wolf is the pack. You soon learn that you need to give respect and only then you can gain respect.
I continued playing while in college and now played with 'men'. They were well built and played basketball professionally. And frankly I was no match for them. I had to go to college and also play basket ball, while they could afford to practise 3 hrs in morning and 3 hrs in the evening daily. But those were fun days. The fun you have when you are surrounded by people who are as crazy and passionate about the same things that you are cannot be described. It is a high that has to be experienced. While my friends would be sitting cinema theaters, pubs, coffee shops and beaches, I would be toiling hard on the basket ball court.
I don't know what drove me so much in those days. And sadly I don't know where that feeling has evaporated. Guess Life happened :(
When I see these medal winners and other participants in the games, I feel like celebrating their success. I feel that I can relate to their hard work and dedication and discipline and know what it takes to reach where they are today. Their success is that much more personal to me. Commonwealth Games has thrown up a lot of new heroes for the nation and for the many communities they belong to. I am sure that it is only going to have a positive effect on sports and the sporting culture of this country.
I was recently discussing with a friend of mine on some ideas for decorating my house. This discussion soon spiraled downwards into a debate which soon became my idea vs. his idea and even though it wasn't acrimonious, it ended up being uncomfortable, at least to me. I thought long and hard about why a simple discussion, ended up becoming so personal. Day in and day out I present my ideas at my work place which are more often than not discarded and thrown out. I do not take them personally. So why at this instance was I unable to keep the focus on the idea or issue at discussion? Am I different at work place and home or was there something more at play?
In fact, there was something more at play. The answer lies in one simple word. 'Label'.
What, labelling an idea does is that it tries to reduce or over simplify the entire idea into a short phrase. Often the phrase is something that already has a well developed association. (positive or negative). For e.g. Modern, old fashioned and so on. So while you do not explicitly target the person, the fact that the person is associated with the labeled idea, he or she, now de facto is also labeled.
And this is exactly what happened the other day. The other person was emphatic about his ideas, which is a good thing. But he also stressed in unequivocal terms that we should be thinking like him i.e. progressive and modern automatically implying that my idea or the idea on the other side of the fence is not-modern or not-contemporary. And I realise now that, it was this point that was the irritant. Now, why would I want to be 'not-modern’ or not-contemporary? I was sub consciously fighting harder and harder to prove that my ideas were also contemporary and modern, when in fact I should have presented my ideas as an alternative proposal to be discussed. So a simple discussion that was so invigourating and pleasurable with so many of my friends, where we built on each others' ideas, turned out to be sour in this case. All attributed to labeling and my poor situational response.
I was talking to a younger friend of mine. He is just starting off his career. Out of an engineering college, he landed into a software techie role. He detests the coding job from bottom of his heart. This is causing him much grief. I guess he is in the process of figuring out what he wants to do with work/ life etc.
A couple of days ago a friend of mine mailed me and 5 or 6 others, generally updating us on her life. This mailing list is a group of us who know each other well, used to hang out in college. Over the past few years after engineering, each of us moved on in the path that we chose/ life took us. So when this one friend mailed in couple of days ago, everyone chipped in with their replies and updates.
That mail trail is an interesting read. People are in different parts of the world and each of them in a different phase of life. One is married, one more engaged. The rest of us are still free birds. Some of us plan to stay single for good. One is searching for a job, one left a lucrative career to be with the love of her life in a different country. One loves her job and is enroute to becoming a CEO but she sits in a small factory town. One quit coding because she hated it, did an MBA and now isn't too happy with her job post MBA. One likes what she is doing, but wondering when exactly she should shake up the status quo. I like what I am doing, but am restless, don’t know why. In all, all of us seem to have made some progress but we are still searching, prodding around. In fact as many stated in as many words, we could spend another decade and not be sure what we want in life.
